Hey all, first time posting a topic and it's more a request for opinion and potentially advice.
So, ever since mid-January I've become more chatty with a coworker, I think it's safe to say that we're friends these days. He was going through a romantic rough patch, I noticed that something was up and asked if he needed to talk. We've been out a couple of times as friends since then, and we message quite a bit too. When we're out together, we barely stop chatting to pause for breath, and we talk about just about everything. He's always been the one to suggest going out. He's doing a lot better these days, so I'm glad that I helped in some way.
The thing is that almost everyone in work thinks that he's bi (for clarification, I'm gay). I'm not so sure personally as he's always talking about wanting a girlfriend, although he has said some things that make me wonder. He's told me about two previous times where he's kissed a guy (while drunk), and he told me that he visited a gay strip club while on holiday back in early February (didn't tell me a lot about the holiday, but that was the first thing about it that he told me).
Whenever I've mentioned guys that I'm interested in, he tells me not to bother with them for various reasons that he comes up (some are actually quite funny). I recently went for a coffee with a guy who used to work at the same place we do, my friend had previously suggested that this guy was just being polite with me but messaged a couple of hours before the coffee to wish me luck. Turned out that the guy is in a long distance relationship and there wasn't much chemistry, so that was that. I told my friend about it, he questioned whether the relationship was 'an excuse', that I didn't need a guy with excuses in my life, and that he'd lost himself a 'good soul' (referring to me).
I've noticed recently that he's not messaging as much (although I think it's more being busy than anything else, as he does get back to me). Yesterday I had one of those wonderful Grindr experiences of good conversation that leads to agreeing to meet, then being stood up and blocked. My friend messaged me about something, I mentioned what had happened, his response was "does he have a Facebook so I can stalk him", and there was some swearing too.
Is he just being a bit protective, or am I being oblivious to something? There was one time that he joked about how our messages aren't as spicy as the pick-up lines that I must get on Grindr, so I told him about some of the more blunt experiences that you can have on there. His response was that those sorts of responses would turn him off, that most guys (not us) either have the personality of a fist or a fuck, and that it's better to like men and women because you get better conversation with a woman.
So, ever since mid-January I've become more chatty with a coworker, I think it's safe to say that we're friends these days. He was going through a romantic rough patch, I noticed that something was up and asked if he needed to talk. We've been out a couple of times as friends since then, and we message quite a bit too. When we're out together, we barely stop chatting to pause for breath, and we talk about just about everything. He's always been the one to suggest going out. He's doing a lot better these days, so I'm glad that I helped in some way.
The thing is that almost everyone in work thinks that he's bi (for clarification, I'm gay). I'm not so sure personally as he's always talking about wanting a girlfriend, although he has said some things that make me wonder. He's told me about two previous times where he's kissed a guy (while drunk), and he told me that he visited a gay strip club while on holiday back in early February (didn't tell me a lot about the holiday, but that was the first thing about it that he told me).
Whenever I've mentioned guys that I'm interested in, he tells me not to bother with them for various reasons that he comes up (some are actually quite funny). I recently went for a coffee with a guy who used to work at the same place we do, my friend had previously suggested that this guy was just being polite with me but messaged a couple of hours before the coffee to wish me luck. Turned out that the guy is in a long distance relationship and there wasn't much chemistry, so that was that. I told my friend about it, he questioned whether the relationship was 'an excuse', that I didn't need a guy with excuses in my life, and that he'd lost himself a 'good soul' (referring to me).
I've noticed recently that he's not messaging as much (although I think it's more being busy than anything else, as he does get back to me). Yesterday I had one of those wonderful Grindr experiences of good conversation that leads to agreeing to meet, then being stood up and blocked. My friend messaged me about something, I mentioned what had happened, his response was "does he have a Facebook so I can stalk him", and there was some swearing too.
Is he just being a bit protective, or am I being oblivious to something? There was one time that he joked about how our messages aren't as spicy as the pick-up lines that I must get on Grindr, so I told him about some of the more blunt experiences that you can have on there. His response was that those sorts of responses would turn him off, that most guys (not us) either have the personality of a fist or a fuck, and that it's better to like men and women because you get better conversation with a woman.
