My boyfriend and I have been together for several years in a monogamous relationship. However since day one, he has always had a much higher sex drive than me. If it were up to him, we would be having some form of sex every day of the week, a few times a day. Whether it’s non-penetrative sex or vice versa. I’m sorry to say but I just don’t have that kind of drive. I’m not sure if it’s because of my age, stress, or my anxiety or what. I eat fairly healthy and I stay fairly active. I still jerk off on my own from time to time if I’m feeling horny and he’s not immediately around to take care of that. But for the most part, I could go days or even weeks without actual sex, and it wouldn’t bother me.
It’s gotten to a point where our sex life has become very routine. We usually only have sex on the weekend and he’s left it up to me to initiate anything, mainly because previous spontaneous attempts by him end up with me reluctantly doing things just to appease him, and him picking up on the fact that I’m not really into it, and then it becomes a whole big thing and neither of us get off and the whole vibe is ruined. Don’t get me wrong, when we do have sex when I’m in the mood, it’s great. And I love having sex with him. But it’s been a challenge for me to match his sexual energy.
In his job he works such late shifts most days of the week, and I work a standard 9-5. By the time he’s home and all that, I just do not have the energy to do much of anything. Which is why our sex life has mostly been restricted to weekends. I feel much more refreshed and energized. I don’t have the constant anxiety of work the next morning running through my mind, etc. And that’s been going ok so far, mostly for me. At the start of our relationship I felt like I was more open to doing things more often and wanting to initiate sex more. But now not so much and it’s starting to be an issue.
He feels I don’t initiate sex enough, and is starting to think it’s because I’m not attracted to him. Which isn’t true. I don’t initiate it all the time because, well, I’m just not in the mood most of the time. I really wish I was. I sometimes feel like the lone wolf around here, because everyone is always so horny and obsessed with sex. I see gays constantly talking about how much sex they have or how often they jerk off every day and all that. And that’s just not me. I mean there are the odd occasions where I will feel super horny and no amount of jerking off or sex will satisfy that hunger until I’m shooting blanks. But that is very rare.
So my question is, how can I fix this? What are some things I can do/take that will boost my sex drive to try and match his? Anybody have any suggestions or have had this issue and found a fix? I want to please my man and want to give him what he needs. I want it too. I want to want to have sex more often. I want to be spontaneous and just get some things going at a moments notice. So any advice is appreciated.
It’s gotten to a point where our sex life has become very routine. We usually only have sex on the weekend and he’s left it up to me to initiate anything, mainly because previous spontaneous attempts by him end up with me reluctantly doing things just to appease him, and him picking up on the fact that I’m not really into it, and then it becomes a whole big thing and neither of us get off and the whole vibe is ruined. Don’t get me wrong, when we do have sex when I’m in the mood, it’s great. And I love having sex with him. But it’s been a challenge for me to match his sexual energy.
In his job he works such late shifts most days of the week, and I work a standard 9-5. By the time he’s home and all that, I just do not have the energy to do much of anything. Which is why our sex life has mostly been restricted to weekends. I feel much more refreshed and energized. I don’t have the constant anxiety of work the next morning running through my mind, etc. And that’s been going ok so far, mostly for me. At the start of our relationship I felt like I was more open to doing things more often and wanting to initiate sex more. But now not so much and it’s starting to be an issue.
He feels I don’t initiate sex enough, and is starting to think it’s because I’m not attracted to him. Which isn’t true. I don’t initiate it all the time because, well, I’m just not in the mood most of the time. I really wish I was. I sometimes feel like the lone wolf around here, because everyone is always so horny and obsessed with sex. I see gays constantly talking about how much sex they have or how often they jerk off every day and all that. And that’s just not me. I mean there are the odd occasions where I will feel super horny and no amount of jerking off or sex will satisfy that hunger until I’m shooting blanks. But that is very rare.
So my question is, how can I fix this? What are some things I can do/take that will boost my sex drive to try and match his? Anybody have any suggestions or have had this issue and found a fix? I want to please my man and want to give him what he needs. I want it too. I want to want to have sex more often. I want to be spontaneous and just get some things going at a moments notice. So any advice is appreciated.