Girlfriend not getting an orgasm

techpump

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You may not have meant it that way but that's the only way it can be taken.

This guy doesn't need to be the one to make her cum with his penis. If he can't accept that A WHOLE LOT of women just aren't gonna cum easily with peen in pussy sex and that his partner may be one, that's not my problem. And I don't feel bad for someone who lets their ego get in the way of giving a fuck about ACTUALLY pleasing their partner.

Nothing against you personally. Or even the OP. I'm just making a very obvious observation. If dudes care more about being the most amazing lay ever than actually wanting happiness for their partner, even if it means they aren't the ones causing the pleasure with their dangling bits, then I care not about their insecurities. They have other qualities they need to focus on.
Yes! And, for good measure, YES.

Guys get so fucking bent out of shape over the idea that if they can't make their woman cum, then THEY feel like a male-failure. Like the end-all goal of being a man is to be the only thing on earth that can make a woman cum. Sometimes my wife doesn't really get off when I give her oral, sometimes it takes seconds, sometimes after minutes its not going to happen. Then I try something different, and it works, or even that doesn't work. Then I ask if she wants to use her fav vibrators or auto toys. She cums her brains out while I'm with her, being intimate with her. And it makes me very happy. If she's cumming, I'm ecstatic. Do I love to make her cum? Of course! But, do I just love when she cums, regardless? Of course x100!!

Its the guys that place their manhood on the "gift" of being some magic entity that is solely responsible for their woman's pleasure that bothers me about men. As if she taking the power into her own hands, or even if he takes the sex toy in his own hand, and she cums from that, its a complete and utter strike against his manhood, then let me tell you, man, you don't have a whole lot of manhood to be ashamed about. Its just yet another way for guys to pawn off their inadequacies and bruised masculinity onto women. That's how I read it and always have.
 

MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK

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You may not have meant it that way but that's the only way it can be taken.

This guy doesn't need to be the one to make her cum with his penis. If he can't accept that A WHOLE LOT of women just aren't gonna cum easily with peen in pussy sex and that his partner may be one, that's not my problem. And I don't feel bad for someone who lets their ego get in the way of giving a fuck about ACTUALLY pleasing their partner.

Nothing against you personally. Or even the OP. I'm just making a very obvious observation. If dudes care more about being the most amazing lay ever than actually wanting happiness for their partner, even if it means they aren't the ones causing the pleasure with their dangling bits, then I care not about their insecurities. They have other qualities they need to focus on.
gotcha. Appreciate your input.
 
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Sagittarius84

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Guys get so fucking bent out of shape over the idea that if they can't make their woman cum, then THEY feel like a male-failure.
Could this have anything to do with women's propensity for finding men that can make her cum even if Mr. Ineffective is still in the picture? Sexually deprived women aren't classically known for their adherence to fidelity, and most long term relationships with toxic guys persist largely because of his sexual effectiveness. Are women cheating on men with men that are more or less sexually capable than their partner?
 

like2Feelabig1

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Could this have anything to do with women's propensity for finding men that can make her cum even if Mr. Ineffective is still in the picture? Sexually deprived women aren't classically known for their adherence to fidelity, and most long term relationships with toxic guys persist largely because of his sexual effectiveness. Are women cheating on men with men that are more or less sexually capable than their partner?
A reasonable argument but with one major flaw.... how does she know that the man she cheats with is going to be more sexually capable until she has actually done the deed?
In my experience most of the best sex I've had was more to do with how much I fancied the guy rather than their technique.
With a few notable exceptions most guys are similar performers when it comes to fucking, and my pleasure response is more to do with how much I'm into them rather than what they are actually doing. After all, at least 50% of the input should be from the woman, shouldn't it?
This is just my opinion based on my own experiences btw...
 

Sagittarius84

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how does she know that the man she cheats with is going to be more sexually capable until she has actually done the deed
You literally answered your own question
In my experience most of the best sex I've had was more to do with how much I fancied the guy rather than their technique.

and my pleasure response is more to do with how much I'm into them rather than what they are actually doing
She likes the guy she cheats with more...this is why he often can be an unproductive, or non committal bum, because she desires him enough that she's content to glean such things from her committed partner whom she is not into.
If the question is why guys get so upset that they can't make their gf/wife cum, it's because it's a subtle signal that the woman is not that that into him, but not enough to simply leave, but most likely to cuckold him in some way. And I think deep down men understand the genuine desire expressed by women for men has a lot more to do with what's going on between her ears than what he purportedly can or can't do between her legs.
 

Sagittarius84

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I've seen men whom are affair partners report to threads about their experiences with wives and GFS, I don't think I've ever seen or heard one complain he couldn't get her to cum, or wouldn't get her wet, or had to beg for her to be wild sexually, these are are things that came standard, almost always with little or no effort or skill on his part; which implies her mindset and desire has a lot more to do with her being able to cum, then anything he's actually doing.
 

MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK

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Alright well i'm gonna try and give an answer that probably should have been given from my first o p here and that is you're not responsible for giving her her orgasm.
So I would stop being an egotist like everybody said and just accept that fact .

Likewise, as tight n juicy pointed out, this really should not be addressed in women's issues.
Who, by the way, I owe a very big thanks for not holding back and telling me exactly what I did Frankly and honestly and straight up.
 

Evenflow618

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Lol, there it is; the black diamond slippery slope argument for cuckoldry...
Nah it somewhat matters how and from what/whom those orgasms are obtained, says a lot about the amount of genuine desire present.
How is this connected to cuckolding? Cucking has nothing to do with giving your woman an orgasm with the use of a sex toy that stimulates their clit