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"What The Fuck Do You Mean, 'I Don't Qualify?'"

Posted 05-07-2008 at 09:05 AM by Notthe7
Updated 05-07-2008 at 09:07 AM by Notthe7
So about ten minutes ago Ms. Katherine Phillips of the UT SA department of financial aide decides to FINALLY give a ring.

I snatch the phone up, "Hello?"

"<insert my name?>"

"Yes Ma'am?" (sometimes im polite when i can smell money)

"Hi this is Ms Phillips. It seems your dad makes too much money and you don't qualify for aide. His social security is too high."

"... What The Fuck Do You Mean... He makes too much money? He doesn't MAKE any money. He is living off a pension of the money he USE to make. You're telling me the 1,300 he receives every month is TOO much money? That he is suppose to be able to take care of his daily medical expenses AND pay for my school? Then WHY did I fill out and send in doctors notes, disability papers, social security proof.... all so you could tell me my dying father makes TOO much money? Wait, wait.. so you made me MAKE my mom and my dad write 2 page letters of his condition and his suffering all so you could tell ME that... 'It's just not sufficient?' "

"Uhm... May I place you on hold ..? "

"Sure."

------ For the record during this whole rant I was half naked.. I had just gotten out of the shower. I go running half naked out of my room (because i get no reception in there). Now my mom is staring at my naked and half wet... astonished not only at the site but what she is hearing. I grab a jacket on the couch to drape over my chest.

The tears start to well... 'Mom, If i don't get this i can't afford to pay for school... not after my car accident..'

-----------

The line cuts back in:

"Okay so________ looks like you were awarded a 2,000 pell grant for this current semester. For the next semester a 1,000 pell grant plus a 4,5000 sub. loan."

"............"

"Would like to accept the grants now?"

"...Yes..yes..."

"Okay, great, you can decide if you want and how much.. of the loan you want to take. I talked to the director and we'll find out what more we can do for you. Okay?"

"Okay."

Click.


'Mom, I think I just yelled my way into $3,000 worth of free money.'

Total Comments 27

Comments

Old
doug61853's Avatar
Cool, and great job! sometimes you gotta play hardball with these pencil pushing suits. Glad it turned out for you!!
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Posted 05-07-2008 at 11:04 AM by doug61853 doug61853 is offline
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njqt466's Avatar
YOU ROCK!

Keep on yelling girlfriend! Don't let those bastards push you around.
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Posted 05-07-2008 at 11:18 AM by njqt466 njqt466 is offline
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Irish's Avatar
Dominated. /hi5
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Posted 05-07-2008 at 12:19 PM by Irish Irish is offline
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dudepiston's Avatar
that is one fricking amazing story! congratulations . makes you think they were just 'testing' you to see if you'd roll over & say "ok, it's ok if you don't give me squat....thanks for trying...." and when you didn't, they realized they had to do something. worries me though cuz it sounds like they're a bit management-impaired and so if i were you, i'd stay on top of this situation. they need to give you an award letter - so it's in writing - pronto!
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Posted 05-07-2008 at 12:52 PM by dudepiston dudepiston is offline
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billybulge's Avatar
Nice work, I like the naked and wet part! I have learned you have to yell and "Motherfucker" people into giving you what you want. Being polite gets you nothing. So does this mean you can afford a squash or zucchini for your next picture set??
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Posted 05-07-2008 at 01:40 PM by billybulge billybulge is offline
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someotherguy's Avatar
Congrats!

I think I'm going to start yelling at strangers to see if I can get free money. Seems to work.
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Posted 05-07-2008 at 02:00 PM by someotherguy someotherguy is offline
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Rockin
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Posted 05-07-2008 at 04:00 PM by jacknapier jacknapier is offline
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Qua?'s Avatar
Good job. I fucking hate the financial aid system. My school just launched a big old "aid initiative" in response to student pressure. It consists of raising tuition across the board and putting the extra money into aid grants. I'm so excited for the extra few grand I'm gonna essentially be giving to someone else next year. Argh. College is expensive and there seems to be no fair way to properly deal with it.
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Posted 05-07-2008 at 07:41 PM by Qua? Qua? is offline
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stacy's Avatar
hahaha don't you just love being a girl? it's great getting your way ;)
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Posted 05-07-2008 at 08:47 PM by stacy stacy is offline
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MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK's Avatar
Heh. Congrats there, Notthe7. You got pissy & got what you needed despite stupid rules-
You go, girl. You're my heroine.
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Posted 05-08-2008 at 06:19 AM by MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK is offline
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njqt466's Avatar
We may have to make her an honorary Jersey Girl, MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK. She definetely has the big, brass, clanky balls which I usually wear as earrings. They can be removed for hand-to-hand combat though.
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Posted 05-08-2008 at 06:38 AM by njqt466 njqt466 is offline
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MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK's Avatar
Knowing Notthe like we now do now, I think we could make them into jingle bells for her Xmas gift there, NJQT.
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Posted 05-08-2008 at 06:54 AM by MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK is offline
Updated 05-08-2008 at 09:15 AM by MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK
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bureaucracy...
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Posted 05-08-2008 at 08:48 AM by SpeedoMike SpeedoMike is offline
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Notthe7's Avatar
Haha, I'm MOVIN' to Jersey!!!!

I can't believe i almost got cock blocked at school.
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Posted 05-08-2008 at 11:23 AM by Notthe7 Notthe7 is offline
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MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK's Avatar
Quote:
Haha, I'm MOVIN' to Jersey!!!!
I can't believe I almost got cock blocked at school.
Oh, goody, a new transplant playmate! We'll find you a crib someplace there, Notthe7, don't you worry.

What happened to you at school? someone trying to keep you from expelling some of that sexual energy?
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Posted 05-08-2008 at 12:00 PM by MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK is offline
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BigA11x7's Avatar
I knew you were feisty, but damn!

I really like how you added nudity to the drama to spice it up. Truly a great story teller. You had me captivated from the start.
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Posted 05-08-2008 at 01:54 PM by BigA11x7 BigA11x7 is offline
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Notthe7's Avatar
Haha, things always happen to me when im naked..

hmmm maybe because im naked.. things happen?
Eh?
Eh?
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Posted 05-08-2008 at 02:13 PM by Notthe7 Notthe7 is offline
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Notthe7's Avatar
Haha Massive, I can just sleep in your bed if you don't mind.
I'm a cover hog though, warning.
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Posted 05-08-2008 at 02:13 PM by Notthe7 Notthe7 is offline
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MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK's Avatar
Heh. Fair warning there, Notthe- I have a death grip on my comforter on a cold night, unless you care to find other ways to keep us warm
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Posted 05-08-2008 at 03:04 PM by MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK is offline
Updated 05-08-2008 at 03:10 PM by MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK
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classyron's Avatar
Notthe7, glad you got the cash... even gladder (real word?) that you made me picture you naked and wet. Please, feel free to make me picture you that way any time.
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Posted 05-08-2008 at 08:40 PM by classyron classyron is offline
 
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