I should be in bed...

... but I had too much coffee (or rather my last cup too late) at work last night.

I dont know what is wrong with me, but I cant sleep for shit.

And I can't sleep fo' shizzle

Sleep is the shiznit.

Why not go to bed and use the caffeine high to wank precociously til you pass out?

Because I might roll into the stain while I sleep, and I'm not much a fan of a layer of spooge on my torso. I can get the force behind my shots to run more than the width of my king size mattress, but I lay lines rather than clear distances with the entirety.

Ah, well... that's where you and I differ then

Further proof that opposites attract. Supply and demand, baby. The basis of sexonomics.