im so confused

i found out my bf logs on to a hooking up website and on his profile it says hes single and this profile is pretty recent weve been together for awhile, i found out he was going on a dating site before and he said it was "just to talk to friends and stuff" what confuses me is he seemed like he was really in love with me and lately iu dont ge that from him anymore

You don't sound confused to me, just a sad realization seems to be coming your way.
I'm sorry for you. It seems he's on his way.

I am so sorry. Before you challenge him, make sure you have a seperate checking account, and enough stashed away to live on for a while.

maybe he is getting bored in the relationship

Listen up baby boy...gay men are one of the most evil things on the planet. When I was younger all I wanted was to find someone to love and to love me back...just one person, but everytime I thought I found someone they just ended up fucking me over. Eventually I just gave up and not until I was 28 did I find the true love of my life. Ironically he turned out to be a straight guy who had been married, to wornen, four different times. We have now been together for almost 7 years. What I am trying to say is that not all relationships work out, some do but most don't. You just need to see that as an always looming possibility so that if it does happen then it isn't as painful. Some people never find their true love, but some people do. Life is always a fucking grab bag and there are never any guarentees. So my best advice to you would be to just figure out what you want out of life and go for it without worrying who will be there to enjoy it with you. I know that seems kind of gloomy but it is the harsh reality that is called life. Keep your chin up!!

bored? hes the one who never wants to have sex, im always the one initiating it

thanks michaelhj, weve been through so much in the little time weve be together, it sucks that it had to be this way

by the way you are a very sexy guy...so don't let it get you down too bad

talk to him. maybe the two of you can have an open relationship. good luck.

You don't sound like the open relationship type and besides and open relationship is nothing but a lie you tell each other to help you deal with the fact that you don't want to be together

ihave to agree with him, im not into open relationships how can u love someone and have sex with other people only a matter of time before those kinds of relationships end

You sound as if your dealing well with all of this, Always remember what my mother told me.... If you love something, let it go... if it comes back, it was always yours, and if it doesnt, then it was never yours to begin with. I can only hope that you find what your looking for in life.... always keep your head held high and never be complacent, always want more... ALWAYS!!
Cheers

M

Xeno, a friend of mine once told me a long time ago that 99% of all gay men are looking for the bigger, better deal.

A gay man could have Mr. Perfect as a boyfriend/husband and they will fuck it up.

If he lies in a profile and he lies to your face and you can't put the clues together all you are in for is a world of hurt.


My advice to you: Ditch him. He's not worth your time.

Sklar

Quote:

Originally Posted by tiggerpoo You don't sound confused to me, just a sad realization seems to be coming your way.

Agreed

Quote:

Originally Posted by hootie I am so sorry. Before you challenge him, make sure you have a seperate checking account, and enough stashed away to live on for a while.

That's good advice!

[quote]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sklar Xeno, a friend of mine once told me a long time ago that 99% of all gay men are looking for the bigger, better deal.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sklar A gay man could have Mr. Perfect as a boyfriend/husband and they will fuck it up.

[quote] Let me fix that for you Sklar, What makes you think bad behavior is exclusive to gay men? That 99% of ALL men are looking for the bigger, better deal. A man could have Miss Perfect as a girlfriend/wife and they will fuck it up.

If he lies in a profile and he lies to your face and you can't put the clues together all you are in for is a world of hurt. My advice to you: Ditch him. He's not worth your time.

Sklar

What's that old Snoop Dog song? Drop him like it's hot, that's what the OP needs to do.

I'm sorry to hear this since I know first hand how it feels. Logging onto chat sites isn't a big deal but if he joined a singles site and paid for a membership and you weren't consulted, then it means that something is 'up' otherwise he wouldn't hide it from you and he'd still want sex.
Mine joined a singles site too and we all know that they're just as big a meat market as any bar can be, he hid it from me but I found out and we talked frankly about it. In the end you can either choose to believe him that he wasn't on the make for some action on the side, or you can tell him to take a hike. If it is a sex site and he removes his profile and closes the account since he knows it's upsetting to you, you might have a chance to work things out. It's too easy to give up instead of working through things as they develop. Your gut instinct is what should guide you. Remember, secrecy leads to lies and both means he has no respect for you.

You deserve better than that.