"Sluts" and "Whores"

I have mentioned this b/4. Women especially young women are kicking the shit out their equivalent men in practically every way. Women get 59% of college degrees, soon to be 62%. It could go to 70%. In the African American community its even worse. Black college females have to marry well below their educational standard if the want a black husband. More than 50% of Med school enrollees are female. I was in a professional honor society. When I joined it years ago it was virtually a stag club. Now more the 55% of its members are female and the number is growing.

It isn't scientific but i offer partnership opportunities to people with a certain degree. Its hard work but the starting salary is $240,000/year. Top producers can earn upwards of $1,000,000. The last 4 partnerships went to young women, 2 from foreign countries!! I am finding it harder and harder to even find young men with that level of education. If they do have it, they don't want to pull the trigger on what is a golden opportunity. Women however see the potential and WANT the challenge. I was in a famous steakhouse seated next to a blond who was an eleven on a scale of 10, 37 years old, making $300K as a broker, and her complaint was she could not find a man who did not feel threatened by her power and wealth.

It might be a bit of a reach, but I do sense a bit of an undercurrent of anger in young (and older) men that they no longer call the shots financially. Is porn the one place where men can put women or see women being put in their place? "Lets hire this chick for $1000 and fuck her like an animal, show her how powerful the male dick is." Meanwhile, in real life, these young men have to kowtow to women who overwhelm them in practically every imaginable way. I bet in your neighborhoods, most of the school valedictorians are female. Your realtor is female. Your young doctor is female or foreign. Virtually all the sales reps that call on me are female. Accountants are female. There are still bastions controlled by men but they won't be in 15 years.

Is porn mirroring a possible male backlash against female successes? I think so.

all the statistics in the world don't make that statement any less disrespectful. black women don't HAVE to marry below their education standard. it may not be easy but its not impossible. i'm hoping that this is just a poor choice of wording on your part, lest you truly believe all black men are knuckle-dragging, basketball-dribbling, rapping good-for-nothing-else mysoginistic neanderthals.

Well, if we're wearing our lawyer costumes for the moment, let me answer your question her behalf:

She's not fulfilling their fantasy. Their fantasy is to have a woman gag on their cock, plunge it into her asshole, and spank her all while calling her a slutty whore. That isn't what she's doing.

Making noises on the phone for a dollar a minute is nothing like that for her, so it isn't comparable to actually doing those acts with someone. No doubt, if she were with a man who liked to hear those things on the phone, she could fulfill that fantasy in a moment's notice. But, evidently, she has no interest in doing those things in real life, and my guess is that she's not with a man who would be interested in doing them anyway.

Answering New End also - I agree with Guy, she's not fulfilling the fantasy, she's participating in it - but it is still a fantasy because there is no actual gagging / choking / forced anal going on.

Also - for some people those kind of acts would not seem loving. Now I know there are loving relationships where the sex can be like that but I also know from talking to a former prostitute that the things a pro does with her (or his) clients are not 'sex' for the prostitute... and they certainly aren't love making. The woman I knew said she disassociated strongly when performing acts on her clients - she didn't consider is 'sex'. It was all just an act for her. When she was with a man she wanted to be with having what she called 'real sex' it was a completely different experience for her.

Also - on the point of auto-erotic asphyxia - I don't believe that it is necessary to be disturbed or have issues to get off on being choked during sex. Auto-erotic asphyxia is more to do with the sensation of nearly passing out being a buzz that enhances orgasm. It is well known that kids play with asphyxia (called the 'scarf game' here in France and the 'choking game' in English, I think) where they take themselves to the point of blacking out through strangualtion for the high it gives. That's non-sexual - auto-erotic asphyxia adds orgasm to that high. It is a physical thing. It's not about being choked by someone - it's about the sensations the choking produces. I've played with it a little myself but didn't find it SO pleasurable that I wanted to risk actual suffocation.

Originally Posted by Wyldgusechaz http://www.lpsg.org/images36/buttons/viewpost.gif
In the African American community its even worse. Black college females have to marry well below their educational standard if the want a black husband.

Quote:

Originally Posted by marleyisalegend all the statistics in the world don't make that statement any less disrespectful. black women don't HAVE to marry below their education standard. it may not be easy but its not impossible. i'm hoping that this is just a poor choice of wording on your part, lest you truly believe all black men are knuckle-dragging, basketball-dribbling, rapping good-for-nothing-else mysoginistic neanderthals.

That's not what he was saying. The statistics he quoted are true!! Speaking as a black woman with multiple degrees and a huge intolerance for hip-hop, rap, ebonics and gangsta luvin'. The pickings are slim!

I got tired of the search a long time ago. It's actually easier for me to date educated, hung, white boys than educated, hung black men.

I could be wrong but I swear I read a couple days ago that you could not find any white guys who want to date you where you live now? If that's the case, how is it easier if there is no action from either group?

I wonder if the pickings are slim as you state because the men don't exist or they have shifted their attention to others? There are many highly educated Black men in America, and maybe it's they have lots of options when it comes to partners? They just don't stay single for long.

But I guess, no matter the reason, if they are not there for you, they're not there. And if the educated hung white men are searching you out and dating you, then that's great for you. It's good that you have people who appreciate you.

I just hope people know that educated African-American exist, they just might have their partners already sorted out.

god thankyou. maybe the person i was responding it to didn't mean it that way but it certainly sounded like "there are no educated black men in america. statements like this bother me because its like first of all, why do we assume everybody else is better educated than us?? every race has its village idiots that do dumb shit, but as far as black males, i see it like this: if some black women would stop spreading their legs at 14 and having babies, we wouldn't have so many black men growing up without fathers, not being raised properly, ending up as prison statistics. the key to ridding the world of uneducated black men is to tie the tubes of these young black girls who can't spell their name but know how to orgasm by 16. maybe brothas would be more educated if mom wasn't club-hopping instead of helping us with math homework. the reason you SEE more uneducated black men than educated ones (statistics show PLENTY of brothers are grads/post grads) is because there are FAR more black men being born by sistas who have no self-respect or sense of community pride. if the only black women having babies were ones who are educated and waited til they were READY to raise a child, we'd have less dumb black men. i don't understand how we expect a nation of scholars to be born when our mothers have us at 15, dump us on grandma so she can chase that thug down the street, then grow up to be a woman who complains about the stupid black men she gave birth to so she turns her back and is rescued by the educated white man. if a teacher's entire class fails, sure you could call the kids dumb but let's start examining why all this teacher's students are failing.

That's as ridiculous as saying since you consented to marriage, there can be no abuse.

It's obvious you have some issues with this topic or you are just being your usual argumentative self. I hope you never work in counseling or psychology. It's one thing to have doubt for someones situation and an entirely different issue to tell the person who is possibly a victim that its impossible to be the victim.

You remind me of someone who if woke up in the middle of the night by your child because he's thirsty you'd respond "Well, I'm not, go back to bed."

I'm still amazed that you feel as a white guy you understand and know the Black male experience and psyche better than I do, as Black male. I who have friends and family members that will speak more intimately about these issues than they ever would around a white guy. Amazing. And because I don't hear the same bs that you hear, then it's because I'm not listening to them? Have I gone deaf? Has my brain turned off while yours has remained so remarkably acute?

Here's the thing, most Black men would never sit around talking about how women oppress or mistreat them because they would get "punked" by the brothas for being such a wimp. Yeah, they might complain about some things, the way anyone would complain about irritations in relationships. But not about being oppressed and mistreated. And certainly not about being feminized. I can just imagine a brotha telling his friends, oh yeah, she's feminizing me--he wouldn't be able to show his face again.

And educated, affluent Black men or religious, church going Black men don't talk about women in the way you describe. It's another reason why I know you're talking out of your ass, because you're getting all of your information from "rap" music. And you don't even understand that. Rap music does not represent the totality of the Black male's experience. It's a small subset and what it relates to is gang culture, not as a response to Black women. Gang culture is about power, but power that is achieved through territory and war--hyper masculine notions of control and dominance. And this is born from feeling powerless in a White America. The misogyny that exists is a reinforcement of their masculinity and alpha male dominance--the guy with the most women or getting the most sex is the man who rules over all. When you have no other options in life, these things become what is tangible--quick money, war with others and sex. None of this is because the men feel oppressed by women, but because they feel impotent in a society run and dominated by White people. And yet all the violence of gang culture is focused on other Black men.

As for those Black men who have chosen White partners, I can tell you they are lying to you. First note, that you say women are oppressing and mistreating men but somehow these white women who oppress white men are not oppressing or mistreating black men--interesting point which only undermines your own argument. Second, some Black men choose White women for many potential reasons: it's a status symbol, it's a taboo, it pisses of White guys, it's easier and because they can get away with stuff they can't with Black women. Not because the Black women are oppressing them but because they won't be treated disrespectfully. Wanting a man to treat you with respect and as an equal is not emasculating.

So show me these books and these interviews. You don't know what you're talking about. You've misinterpreted the experiences of Black men because you are interpreting them through your own misogynistic frames. You think women are emasculating men, so you think everyone thinks like you. Where are your real examples of how women emasculate and oppress men? You make no sense to me but if these are your views, you'd be best to avoid women and they'd be best to avoid you.

I dont know how this subject got spun off into the world of black and white people. There are far more white people in mainstream porn and mainstream porn in general is what i'm talking about.

If we want to start a topic on the cultural issues within the black community for whatever reasons you guys have....by all means start a thread on it. I don't want to lose track of this subject entirely because there are so many people responding to one another that it can get a little confusing.

sorry madem, somebody said something really disrespectful and i got a lil upset, here's your thread back...

Marley, thanks for your support but I can't let you get away with that rant. It takes two to make a baby and if some young black women are getting pregnant, it's because some young black men have been all too eager to prove their manhood and no one is using condoms. This isn't just an issue with African-Americans but with all teenage pregnancies (there are more White teenage pregnancies than Black, so please spread that blame around to everyone). Why are there teenage pregnancies among all groups? One is lack of access to birth control, two raging hormones, and three girls who feel lost and think that having a baby will give them a sense of identity and someone to love.

As for the lack of education, you only need to look at the schools, the money they get for resources, the neglect by the school systems and the social and economic environment that pushes many to make money to survive. These issues are deep and are far more complex that what you suggest above. Lots of Black women work hard to take care of their children and give them good lives. Many of the educated Black men come from mothers who have never gone to college.

There are many forces at work here, but demonizing 15 yo girls distorts the reality and complexity of the issues.

I totally understand how you guys would want to respond on this issue, especially if you are a black person. I know there is so many directions that topic could go in i don't want to lose track of the original topic. That's all. I'm sure if you started a thread about it there would be many more people with input who might not be reading this thread at all.

Sorry M Rouge, you're right. However, we got here because someone tried to associate the issues you brought up to the influence of rap music. So in essence they were arguing that porn (which as you correctly note is driven by white people) has become more derogatory to women because of rap (primarily driven by Black males). I would never have seen anyone make that leap but then I underestimate people's ability to blame Black men for all of society's ills.

I never said anything close to this. It is simply a math problem, for both white and black women, but it is acute in the black community. If 60% of college degrees go to women, then ALL women will have it tougher to find an equally educated partner. In the black community I have read stats where the discrepancy is getting to be 80/20!!, women to men college degrees. You do the math.

BTW I will hijack this thread a bit. Your statement in another post in this thread that there are plenty of black men with degrees is not borne out by statistics. But this is LPSG and every one here loves to argue against cold hard facts as if wishing was more honest than pure arithmetic.