Heh heh, smartass. I haven't seen the Fisher in stock at our store. The Dante ones look pretty cool, especially in the pockets and the back, but I already have a darker whiskered wash. The Valencia will get you started at about $40 less if you don't mind a little bit rougher in the denim. The Region? Meh. I don't think the striped inner band is worth it. If you can still find them in stock, go for the Bloom because the denim color is a medium cast with a nice bluish-green undertone, great for a lot of brighter spring colors. The Manhattan is a perfect navy shade. Oh, and the Stratus is definitely a rocker-friendly jean. It's almost monochromatic deep ocean blue with a sharp firebird detail on the back pockets.

(Allow me to translate. A "Falcon" describes a Guess jean style defined by a super low rise, a slim fit, and a boot cut opening. Terminology like Fisher, Dante, etc. are washes -- colors of the denim.)