I started having man-sex at 17. Anything prior to that was a lot of experimentation. Nine years later I met a boy at the gym, we were the same age and he was straight at the time. I worked the graveyard shift and he used to come work out at random hours of the night to be able to talk to me (he later fessed up). We were 26 and each other's first boyfriends... it lasted 3 years. I never had a relationship prior to that and he had never been with a man before. We were head over heels in love with each other but it ended badly. I guess the timing was off and we both just needed more experience in relationships. He has subsequently gone back to dating women and I have chosen to eliminate further communication with him. It was wonderful and extremely painful at the same time; however, I am happy to have been in love. Prior to that I had thought there was something emotionally wrong with me because I never felt any intense feelings for anyone. I look forward to falling in love again, but after this harsh lesson, I have become gun-shy about getting involved with another straight or bisexual man. I prefer the company of gay men.

"It is better to have love and lost than never to have loved at all" ...true that.