How to deal with being a 31-year-old male virgin

bguy

I'm sure no one here has any experience with this, but I don't really know where to turn and I could use some advice from people who know about sex and large penises (this is the place for that, right?)

I only dated one girl for about four years and saved my virginity for marriage. But after we got married she never had intercourse with me. I tried to be respectful of her feelings and didn't want to pressure her. She always told me she'd never been happier and I was the best thing to ever happen to her, so I didn't want to ruin things by being pushy or demanding.

After 7+ years, she cheated on me with her coworker (no intercourse with him either) and she walked out of the marriage when I discovered the infidelity. She could never really give me a single, straight answer why she wouldn't have intercourse, but one of the many reasons she gave me was that I was too big (which I didn't even really realize, due to my naivete).

Now I'm a 31-year-old virgin and afraid no woman will ever want me. Because it seems like women want someone confident and experienced, which I'm never going to be until I get some experience. Kind of like how when you're looking for a job, they all want you to have work history; but you can't get work history until you find a job. And I don't think there's internships for having sex.

I need all the advice I can get, because I don't want to be the 40-year-old virgin!

stacy1185

come to LA and i'll lay you!

I need to be myself.
I can't be no one else.

HazelGod

In the unlikely story that is America, there has never been anything false about Hope.

Halliefreak

AWWW! I'm so sorry to hear that! I'm a virgin too...lol.

bguy

stacy, you're the smartest, sweetest, coolest person on this site! If you gave me the opportunity to even just give you a footrub I'd drive down to LA tonight!

stacy1185

awww you're so nice!

i feel so bad that your ex-wife never wanted to have sex with you. why did she marry you in the first place then? ugh, i just don't get women who pull shit like that. obviously she couldn't appreciate you as a whole, and you don't deserve to be treated like that. you deserve someone better who'll appreciate you in all aspects (and who'll also give you all the sex you want ).

I need to be myself.
I can't be no one else.

mrniceguyinfl

You really dont have time to waste..... you are 31 years old and have not had sex..... be more agressive or let loose, relax go to a library, bar any public place even a supermarket you can find yourself a nice woman. stop have and issue about being unexperienced woman will sense that if your nervous. let your guard down... relax take it easy....before you go on a date rent some porn video masterbate so u wont be finish in 2 seconds or before you take off your underwear (ex. american pie movie) and learn about foreplay before you penetrate. touching a woman is always key before penetration. lightly message her back with tender kisses to her neck. nibble on her ear.... massage her ass, lightly kiss her stomach legs and suck on her toes... that will make her go crazy... before you ever touch her coochie... you must pay alot of attention to all of her body. then leave her ass and coochie for last.... buy the time you insert you cock in that coochie she will give you the strongest orgaism ever. (just becareful she might wanna marry u, DONT....)
anyway good luck.

Slant

You strike me as a well-spoken, sensitive guy, and I think that's a big part of your problem, sadly. You're obviously a really pleasant dude and I do empathize with you, but I think you'd gain a lot from the ''oh well, her loss" attitude to some degree. Start thinking of your own needs and wants and pursue them. Consider what you really need in life right now and up your standards to match it. I'm not just talking about finding someone who'll have sex with you, but someone who scratches your itch in precisely the ways you like. But above all, get out there and have some fun. There will be people who appreciate you in many different ways, but keep things understated until you know them a little better. Act like what you've got between your legs is a blessing, not a curse, and develop an overall attitude to go with it. Best of luck to you.

6'5''/215/brown/green/8x5.5 cut.

bguy

I think she was just a very selfish person. Even though we never had intercourse, I was very happy to give her other means of sexual pleasure (big fan of oral). Kinda assumed there might be some reciprocity some day, but nope. I guess we all know what happens when we assume...

I agree wholeheartedly! I know I'm not a rich super-hunk, but I'm a kindhearted, caring and patient (obviously!) guy and I figure some women out there must want that. Just wish I could figure out where they're hiding.

bguy

Thanks for that advice. I think it'll be easier for me to not be nervous if I know that's ultimately better for the both of us.

That I'm actually quite comfortable with, as that's what I'm most familiar with. Plenty of experience there (although would love more).

bguy

I think you're right that it's about the overall attitude. I have definitely reached the point of 'oh well, her loss' towards my ex-wife, which was a big step for me. So now that I know what that feels like I can start growing it a bit. Thanks for the encouragement.

vince

If all else fails, I agree. Perhaps you should just pay for some sex, pop your cherry and get it over with. Once you realize that you too can fuck and that you're not ''too big'', you'll gain some confidence. Not the ideal solution, I know, but time's a wasting man.

btw- you didn't mention your dimensions.

http://www.xtube.com/play

vince

Just wondering... In a case like this could the partner who withheld sex be sued for breech of faith? Is there such a thing?

http://www.xtube.com/play

bguy

8.5 x 6, curved, cut

vince

Then she was bullshitting you.

http://www.xtube.com/play