Spent a few days at the Dubai Tennis tournament. Interviewed most of the players there and saw three cocks:

Tommy Haas: Average cock but the man is a total prick!

Rafael Nadal: With all of the ass he is getting I am surprised he has the time and stamina to play tennis. I heard that he was with 9 different women in a span of 3 1/2 days!

Roger Federer: I am still in shock at how the worlds number 1 tennis player can be so down to earth. I saw him meet and greet a boat load of people and he seemed to be genuinely happy that people wanted to see him. Thats why I kind of felt bad for him when I saw him naked. Ok he was completely soft but if it was any smaller he would be on the woman's tour.