How do you know if someone is gay??

Don't forget the sequins!

An important question is why you really want to know. Just because somebody's gay doesn't mean that he's open to sex or friendship . . . and a guy who doesn't identify himself as gay may be interested in more than exchanging a glance.

There have been some instances when I've been grabbed , fondled, and kissed without introductions, or conversation (eg., in a bar where the perpetrator's already drunk) as an exception, but otherwise, all the other relationships I've started have begun with conversation to (1) show interest, then to see if the direction and structure will be friendship, sex, sports team recruitment, help, ...

Sorry, if I'm being dense

Also feel that sometimes, eye contact is a dead give away. There have been a number of times when I've been waiting at an elevator and a guy will look at me, walk on by and then come back, look me directly in the eyes and ask "Are you going down?" If you're on the top floor of a building, that's really a no brainer and my first impulse is to laugh. However, if you both get on, you're alone, and he fumbles for words to make small talk, it's generally more than a hint.

It's easy.. they always wear pink, have a limp wrist whenever they point to something and always call everyone ducky...
The only way to know someone's sexual preference is to forget about any sort of stereotype and maybe have the confidence to ask. I mean if one want's to know that you are probably getting some sort of vibe in the first place.. but appearances can be deceptive.

David: You know how I know that you're gay?
Cal: How?
David: You like the movie Maid in Manhattan.
Cal: You know how I know you're gay?
David: How?
Cal: I saw you make a spinach dip in a loaf of sourdough bread once.
David: You know how I know that you're gay?
Cal: How?
David: You have a rainbow bumper sticker on your car that says "I love it when balls are in my face."
Cal: That's gay?

—From The Forty-Year-Old Virgin

OMG! I'm a gay man!

My gaydar fluctuates from fully functional to, barely working. But you bi-guys skew everything! I can rarely tell a bi-guy even after talking to him for an hour. This has caused a myriad of embarassing a situations and missed opportunities on my part unfortunately.

The person with the big G tatooed on his forehead, just ask!

appearances and "vibes" can be deceptive, sure, but those stereotypes have to come from somewhere.

My "gaydar" seems to be sharper than most people's. But I think I'm just more observant than most people are. I can guess all sorts of obscure information about someone just based on the way they talk, how they look, and how they present themselves. I know I'm not always right, and it's dumb to assume that anyone ever could always be right making such assumptions, but usually I'm right.

Sometimes people mistakenly assume that I'm gay. Not sure why. Maybe because I'm usually a snappy dresser?

Ryan, you are fierce!

Does that make me seem gay?

at what are they looking when their pupils get larger?

still not sure, ask them about Madonna's latest album

This is a very delicate situation. You're not out. He's not out. And neither of you know how far (or if) the other is interested and possibly curious-- or not! SO, APPROACH WITH CAUTION!!

Choosing how to make your move depends largely on how you met this guy. Do you know him from work, the gym or school? Is he a neighbor? In my personal experience, it was easier to ask a co-worker to hang out for happy hour than it was to ask that handsome neighbor in my apartment building to go out for coffee. But I did both-- and with good results.

When it comes to getting or giving personal information, I try not to be gender-specific. For instance, instead of asking "Do you have a girlfriend?", I will ask "How's the dating scene treating you? You seeing anyone?" or "You ever meet/date somone off the Internet?" And listen closely to his answers, because how open or private he is will give you lots of clues!!

Tell us a little more, Sportymike. You'll get more and better free advice from LPSG if we know more about your situation. Your ages? How you met? Similar interests? What you're too nervous to do or say?

I promise you that there's a perfect way to approach the situation.

Definitely one of the bests responses/posts to this type of question that I've read on LPSG! Bravo. I'd listen to more of what this guy has to say than anybody else who's responded so far, including myself, because time & circumstance have shown that I have zero clue when it comes to this stuff.

What about "GAYDAR"???
i thought most gay men had this???