I dont want to have kids

My age is 27 and having kids is a very huge responsability . I dont think I was born to these huge task. Most people think that having kids is a game , to me isnt .

Re: Many people still do naturally want "traditionally very large" families.

Are you so sure that rabbits "breed like rabbits?"

God didn't give people condoms nor "birth control." There's no hint in the Bible, that God ever intended for humans to "limit" their natural family growth, but rather that God opens and closes the womb, and practically speaking, people often find they aren't near as fertile as they thought.

If you think that children are always too hard to raise, and they they don't sometimes, partially raise or watch themselves or their siblings, then that's an inaccurate prejudice brought on largely by our "modern" society of pidly small families. Places where families still tend to be large, probably would not think much that way.

And there's probably more people around still, who would naturally prefer to "breed like bunnies," than some might like to admit. Surely most guys would naturally prefer to just naturally cum inside their wives, without needless worry, and why not? Sperm is harmless. All it can do, is maybe make a baby, and probably not "this time" anyway, but more like next time, or the time after that. And bring more children to life, is supposed to be a "good" thing to encourage. And of course, I encourage personal responsibility, that good dads and moms take interest in loving and raising their many or few children, well.

Currently I dont have a girlfriend but I make myself clear to all my past girlfriends that I dont want to have kids. I'm really honest in the relationships about that.

[quote=pronatalist;1161130
[B]If you think that children are always too hard to raise, and they they don't sometimes, partially raise or watch themselves or their siblingsto be a "good" thing to encourage.[/b]

So you're advocating having loads of kids and leaving them to fend for themselves allowing their parents to breed a huge litter but freeing them off the responsibility? I was part of a large family as was my father and many of my cousins (my father was one of 14, the smallest family they produced was six children) and kids don't bring themselves up.

Most married men do cum inside their wives, wives are usually on the pill, have a coil or some other form of birth control which allows this - but if you honestly think every time a man spurts in his wife that he's secretly hoping she conceives you must have a loose grip on reality.

God might well have changed his mind since the Bible was written seeing what a mess we make of things - and who are you to speak for God anyway?

A friend of mine once said that having children was the most selfish thing anyone could ever do because you're forcing your choice to have a child on some poor unsuspecting sprog who has no say in who its parents are. He's since gone on to produce two.

You never know who's going to be a good or bad parent until it's to late. I've seen some people who, on paper, should be disastrous parents doing a great job of it and raising healthy, well-behaved, happy kids in a loving, caring home. Some, who should have been wonderful parents have raised little monsters - maybe that's getting into the nature/nurture thing - and others have turned into complete tyrants and won't let their offspring say or do anything 'kid-like' such as have fun.

Whatever happens, don't decide to have kids or not have kids because of what someone else wants. If you're being responsible about it, it's something for you and your partner to decide (barring accidents), not your parents. Are they going to raise the kid? And going by what you say, you wouldn't want to let them even if they would! Sorry if I sound flippant, but it's either that or I give a sermon. It sometimes isn't your choice whether or not you have children. Accidents happen. Say one night a condom split and a couple of years later, you found out you had a child. Would you walk away? It certainly sounds like you've thought a lot about it, and, more importantly, it sounds as if you've thought about it from the point of view of the child's welfare, not your own. You never know, you might surprise yourself and turn out to be a great dad given half a chance.

Ideally, I'd like to have kids myself some day, but I can't see that happening somehow. Maybe it's the gay thing. My sister has kids anyway, so I'm off the hook from the genetics point of view and it's great to turn up now and again and spoil them and have fun, but the real plus point is to be able to say, "He needs changing," and walk away. Actually, aside from anything else, I don't feel grown-up enough to be a parent. I'm way too selfish and immature.

I am for your not having children.

I am against your excuse.

If you don't want them just say "I don't want them."
The justification and blaming whomever is unneccessary.

What are you talking about ? I said clearly that I dont want kids. I just make a brief explanation of why.

I hear ya . I will not have kids because I dont want to but if I get a girl pregnant I will take care of my child. I would never run of the responsability but I prefer that this never happen . Like you said accidents happen.

[quote=SpoiledPrincess;1161140]I'm with SP on this one. I come from a fairly large family and know other people from similar families. The Bible says, "Go forth and multiply," and, being a good religious man, my grandfather took that to mean on a logarithmic scale. I won't say how many kids he had, but suffice to say more than SP's grandparents had. Anyway, that's all besides the point. The whole go forth and mulitply command referred to a time when the tribe of Israel was just that, a large family and they needed the extra numbers. Times have changed a little since then and we've got far too many people as it is. I think it's very irresponsible of people to advocate unrestrained breeding - especially if they can't afford to raise their own kids without relying on everyone else to support them in their selfish choice.

I know I want kids. I love children. I'm more afraid of being a bad husband.

Plus, I guess I have an innate desire to be a better parent than my parents.

The why is the problem guy. You cannot base your entire arguement, all your logic, every ounce of your being, off of someone else. It's bullshit.

I don't care if your dad raped you upside down whilst your mother tried to drown you in the toilet, your excuse of a reason is not rational.

All that's neccessary is I don't want children but then you have to enter into bullshit land and give some illogical validation like because mommy and daddy simply weren't the best.

First off it's bullshit because parenting ability is not genetic; kids who come out of the system, some turn into great parents, others horrible, others median. Some who come from the worst the same thing; regardless in all aspects it is a conscious choice.

The only arguements I can see making you blaming your parents logical are if you were domestically violent against your partners, if you had a substance abuse problem, and if you were a pedophile or pedophobic. If you're a pedophile that doesn't instantly make you a child molestor but stands as grounds not to have children ( and can be blamed supposedly on genetics ), if you're domestically violent ( which it would be interesting if only towards children ) it makes sense as you can pick that up from your parents, and substance abuse you can pick up only if they introduce you to it ( being born addicted isn't the same thing because you can be "waned and cured" for the most part with only a tendency latent instead of viable addicion ) so you blaming your parents makes no sense.

Your "Why" sucks.

You are saying that my why sucks when you dont have a clue of what happen to me in my life . I choose to make a brief general explanation because I dont want my private life being exposed here. Most members dont care about my private life and I dont want to talk in detail about it.
Is not bullshit . Parent ability isnt generic but is a fact that many adults repeat the same or similar mistakes of their parents to their kids without being aware of it.

UK Viking, for future reference, Logarithms go down.

Your grandpa had kids on an Exponential Scale.

I read that and laughed a little because according to you your grandfather was, with every pregnancy, smaller and smaller fractions of a child. From 1 > .5 > .35. > 000932 etc. Eventually your grandpa was having swatches of skin to show for reproductively.

Look, I really don't want all up into your life. I am saying that your "reasoning" which I read as follows:

I do not want children because my parents were terrible and I fear being like them.

Makes no sense. That is like blaming either parental figure for being poor no matter how good a job you get because being bad at spending money is "genetic". I am not against you not wanting kids, and it's fine that you don't, but it does both you, and everyone involved, a serious disservice and allows for undue hardship to live in fear of, and blame others for, your own rationale.

Scapegoats can keep people happy but only for so long; living in fear is the same thing. Don't have children, fine, but don't blame anyone else or cower at the idea solely based upon what happened to you and thus people who do not have a bearing on what you do.

In short: You aren't your parents.

Then again to each his own; it is my opinion only that it's rather sad to live that way. For the record I don't want kids either, and I used to do the same thing, blame my parents.

I dont blame my parents of everything that happen to me in my life of course . We have to face our mistakes and we make wrong decisions or mistakes. The only way to understand why I said that is exposing my life here but I will not do that .