Girlfriend potential or just friend?

"Thats what she said" seems to work

It's almost creepy you brought that up Icem. That's been the running gag with us so far.

No alcohol. She's completely independent of that stuff. She's smoked a little weed and gotten drunk before though, sure, but I think she generally looks down on people that need extra chemicals to have a good time.

Which is part of the fun, actually. As an addict/alcoholic, this may be exactly what I need to keep on the straight and narrow and finally build a meaningful relationship. Besides, I'm probably more nervous drunk than I am sober...but that's from years of abuse and acquired tolerance.

Well, cutie, good luck.

My advice, for what it's worth, is to first ask a few questions like, "What kind of relationships are good? What kinds are you looking for?" "Where do you see yourself six months from now?"

This might sound kind of lame, but it sometimes helps to speak generally about relationships before getting involved in one. That way you both get a feel for what you're looking for.

And don't forget -- if she says some really whacky things, then you've just saved yourself a really whacky journey.

yeah then she'll start thinking of you as a friend that she doesn't want to get involved with for fear of "ruining" the relationship, or some other guy with balls will swoop in and steal her away from you. Hot cool girls don't usually stay single for very long.

yes exactly. I wasn't arguing that you should just charge blindly in... just try to be physically connected and nominally affectionate in some way... you'll be able to tell a lot about how she's feeling toward you based on her reaction. Then.. if she reciprocates... don't be dickless and step it up when you feel its appropriate to do so. Girls don't like guys who are too timid to do anything when the girls are sending out their enigmatic "signals" that we're all supposed to magically pick up on.

Beg to differ with you on that one NIC. I get alot of attention, but I am picky about with whom I have a relationship. It takes time to know someone.

What about trust and respect...
If she is a attractive girl she may just be fed up with getting the hard word being put on her.
Don't be in an all fired hurry to close the deal...that just puts you in the same class as all the other guys that have chased her.
Try Wooing the girl....a flower just for her..it might be a daisy or a rose..open doors, hold her hand, tell her she looks lovely, open doors....a small peck on the cheek to say hello...leave a short brush of the lips for good night and tell her then that you really enjoy being with her, it will turn into full scale kissing if the timing and chemistry is right.
It doesn't have to be a huge grand gesture..it's the small thoughtful things that mean the most.

Go ahead and differ. I won't make you beg.

smart ass!

36 - if a guy does what he thinks will be the thing to get you, and you are having none of it, would you recognize that and suggest "Hey, what about trying THIS?" and suggesting something that you would like? Thankful for the suggestion, he does what you say and it works out for you both, wouldn't that be nice?
This poor kid is just trying to figure it out. And he is asking people who have been there before and this is what we offer him?
Come on folks. Help they kid out.

I did help the kid out...read Goodwood...I was responding to NIC's comment that the hot cool ones are quickly taken...that is not true...I am single, that is all I meant.

Thanks 36 for the clarification. I just feel badly that amp is having such a time of it. And this is what we proffer.

Well he can only do what he feels he is ready for...has anyone heard from him today? He might very well be in the throes of passion as we speak!:s mile::biggri n1:

...or, at least, moving things forward a step...

I must admit, I've had some very enjoyable time moving things forward... slowly (and, yes, getting there!).

I appreciate all the advice.

On a note of update, things were a little bouncy tonight. I had work and an old buddy of mine sprung it on me when I got off that he was in the area. Directly after, this girl in question calls and I guess has some girlfriend in the back giggling at everything I say. I was hesitant to reschedule with my friend, and I thought it would be a good way to see if she's really that interested.

I went to a public place near my area to meet my friend. We had a long conversation and caught up on what's been going on since we've been in college. This girl calls me again, but this time there's some other guy friend of hers in the background. (Like I said, she may just like having guys as friends) She was right in the same area at another store. I was pretty casual about it and said I was a few doors over and to come say hi. Here's the strange part. She saw some friends at the place before I was within line of sight and wound up just chatting with them then leaving before I even got to say hi to her. I was online earlier this evening and we chatted for a bit. I just kept it light and happy. It seemed to end on a good note but there's still so much doubt involved.