My Brother's "Out of Control" Pubes

Thanks for the advice everyone. I'm just gonna ask him if he wants to read this.

As far as people saying to "mind my business" I want you to realize the open relationship my brother and I have: which is non-judgemental and helpful always.

I don't care what he does I just want him to be educated on the issue.

For whatever genetic reason, I don't have the same issue, and he knows it.

The funny thing about this thread is if it were a young woman in question, the debate would amount to nothing but a unified urge to get her to shave. Somehow it is okay to encourage a young woman to shave, but when it comes to encouraging a young man, suddenly we bring out the "it's his pubic hair, it's his decision" card, which seemingly isn't even a consideration when discussing a young woman's pubic hair. This makes no sense to me.

You've already asked him the question. He was ok with his pubes. the end.
maybe this is all about you?

To quote Dear Abby (before your time...), "MYOB". Meaning, "Mind Your Own Business."

If he asks your advice, tell him whatever you want. Sounds like he's got his own opinion, which is good (since they're his pubes).

And, for the record, many of us LIKE the "natural" look on both men and women and don't care for all this shaving/trimming stuff.

Alex555, if I understand your original post correctly, you seem to think that your brother's pubic hair growth is in some way abnormal. I'm not sure if "wild and out of control" means exceptionally long or bushy or what.

However, maybe they just look strange to you because haven't seen that many normal, natural pubes. Is this possible?

Obviously some people are bushier than others. If your brother is within the normal range, even if he's at the hairier end of normal, then many people will like him just the way he is. Some people are really turned on by a nice, thick bush.

If his pubic hair is truly wild, then yeah, it's going to turn some people off. Some people will get over it, and some people won't. He can either accept that and wait until he meets someone that likes him the way he is, or he can start trimming and widen his pool of potential partners. To answer your question, I don't see any point to him trimming down there for the sake of a future relationship, because we don't yet know what his future partner's preferences are, plus he's indicated that he's OK with himself in his natural state. I don't think we can assume that most people prefer trimmed/shaved pubes. Obviously a lot of people here at LPSG do, but I'm not sure we represent the majority of the population. I don't think most people are as penis-obsessed as we folks here at LPSG are, and they don't waste their time grooming their pubes any more than they waste their time in this forum.

Personally, I have never been turned off by natural, unshaved, untrimmed pubes. I think shave pubes look really stupid. Sometimes (but not often) I like the look of trimmed pubes, but only if it's done right (i.e., medium-length & neatly groomed, not crew-cut done with a weed-whacker). Unfortunately, I think most people do a BAD job trimming, leaving the hair too short or patchy looking.

I object to the attitude of disgust that so many people seem to have towards natural pubes, as if people who don't trim/shave have poor personal habits. I think that perception is insulting and completely unjustified. I think trimming/shaving the pubes is a relatively recent fad, not some kind of long-standing norm. It's not like getting a haircut or trimming your fingernails. It's more like dying your hair. Lots of people do it, but most people don't. Most people go with what's natural for them.

I don't think he should mind his own business. Some people grow up and don't realize that other people trim or shave their pubes. Some people are shy about asking others about sexual matters, especially when young. I wish friends had talked more about sexual things with me when I was young, so I didn't have to learn things on my own.

In this case, it's good to explain that some people shave, trim or wax their pubes. Then leave it up to him. But at least now he knows all of these are options. He shouldn't be pressured into doing it though.

First off, Meniscus--excellent post!

I snipped this part because I didn't really get the impression that not trimming is automatically indicative of poor personal habits. Perhaps it's because I infer that the phrase "poor personal habits" encompass a lack of personal grooming including a lack of showering, cleaning, etc. I've personally never associated a full bush with a dirty person.

I did mention that longer pubic hair, in my opinion, gives way to more frequent sweating and also traps the sweat within the hair shafts, thereby creating more of a [to be polite] musky smell. But dude--people sweat. It happens. It's not a matter of skipping the shower, it's a matter of environment.

You know you are mostly coming across as control freaks in this thread. Shaved or natural? It's a personal choice and the owner's to make.

It winds me up somewhat when I see posts like " Tell him to do this" " Get him to do that" . To the OP mind your own damned business. You'd be offended if your brother tolf you to let them grown as they looked so gross trimmed.

Says who?

I know my advice would be the same. Let the person to whom the pubes in question belong decide what to do with them.

If a sibling told me to change the way I groom my pubes because in their esteemed opinion it would look better I would tell them to shut up because in my esteemed opinion they would sound better.

It's only hair; most of you need to get over it. This guy is only asking for our opinion. If his brother decides not to do it then so be it and if the brother that is asking decides to tell him again, who frickin cares It’s only “Hair”
End of Subject!

Thanks for clarifying. I'm not sure that more pubic hair causes more sweating, but I agree that it traps the sweat. Some people sweat more than others, regardless of how hairy they are, and some people have more of an odor problem than others. If a person has a sweat/odor problem, I doubt that trimming the pubes is really going to help much, although it's worth a shot. A person who had that problem needs to figure out what works for them, whether that be washing more often (particularly before sex) and/or using powders or other products to stay fresh & dry. Those deodorant salt crystals are a good way to go. They don't stop the sweating, but they inhibit the growth of bacteria. (Plus they are hypoallergenic and work for sensitive skin.)

But just because a person has naturally hairy pubes doesn't mean he or she is going to have an odor problem. Some of the guys I've been with have had a mild musty smell, which comes with the territory as far as I'm concerned--that's how a guy is supposed to smell down there. I only knew one guy who had an unpleasantly strong odor, and in his case he just had to start washing more often.

Tell him to let it just grow. There me included people that love a good bush. He needs to set an example for women and men that bush is good.

Since when is having thick pubes a problem? If he has to shave them for a relatinship, then something is wrong. Let him be natural. He'll figure it on his own if he wants to shave them or not. Actually alot of teens and young adults start off with " out of countrol " pubes. It really sucks that men have become so over self concious and look at being natural as an oddity.

They're his pubes and they're none of your business, personally I think his attitude of 'she'll have to deal with it' is a much healthier one than 'I'll have to shave to fit in with what people seem to want nowadays.'

Pubic hair is designed to trap that 'musky' smell Eva because that musky smell is designed to be a turn on sexually.

Says who?

Besides, he has explained his relationship with his brother. The relationship you have with your sibling is a different one and incomparable with his.

The "freedom" some of you are trying to give this brother is a false one. Such a "freedom," to let him make his own decision, is a passive way of just saying: have your brother to keep his pubic hair, hereby upholding the stereotypes of "man" and "woman." Man keeps his pubic hair, but woman cuts it off.