All right, I’ll grab the shaft on this thread and give this a new phallic curve. Yes, I discovered the Manly Art of Choking the Chicken at an early age. One magical night in the summer of my 11 th year, I discovered that trying to get rid of a boner by rubbing it would lead to an explosive mess. I was hooked. I was also pretty damn naive. I didn’t know what they called this, but, damn, I wasn’t going to stop. An insatiable abuse of my manhood proceeded for many years. My father walked in once and was horrified—“Don’t do THAT!!” I told him I had an itch. I’m not sure he bought it , but the minute he was gone, I took care of that itch with great style. After that I found better times and places to practice my new hobby.