08-15-2006
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#1 (permalink)
| | | What about the Parents? Just a quick question for the guys and gals here.
How is your relationship with your parents? I ask because I am curious to see if stats that I read the other day, are similar to the results in an informal poll.
Plus, I am curious to see how many people still have great relationships with mom and dad if they came out of the closet, and compare them to those who are straight. Either way, I am interested in results. Please post your heart out about the subject.
No incest, thanks. | | | |
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08-15-2006
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#2 (permalink)
| | | great relationship with my parents. love them dearly, both attended the birth of my son. | | | |
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08-15-2006
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#3 (permalink)
| | | My parents and I get on superbly now. We have three nations separating us geographically, and see each other about once a year. We communicate a couple of times a week by phone and email. And we all acknowledge that distance is a great thing in our relationship!
All under one roof, we would drive one another insane... and then we didn't speak at all for two years, when I was around 19-21. They changed; and I changed... not enough to share a living space or too much contact, but enough to re-locate our love for one another.
Being 'in' or 'out' of the closet really had next to no bearing on any of the above.
As per your request, no insects were harmed during the writing of this post. | | | |
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08-15-2006
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#4 (permalink)
| | | Quote: |
Originally Posted by jeff black Just a quick question for the guys and gals here.
How is your relationship with your parents? I ask because I am curious to see if stats that I read the other day, are similar to the results in an informal poll.
Plus, I am curious to see how many people still have great relationships with mom and dad if they came out of the closet, and compare them to those who are straight. Either way, I am interested in results. Please post your heart out about the subject.
No incest, thanks. |
Lets see here, My Father and Step Mother accept me for who I am but don't talk to me, actually the last time they did talk with me was when they asked me to babysit sit my younger brother (4). My Mother talks to me on the phone every few days, but shes still uneasy, I also visited last weekend (That was not a pleasant experience, but that was for other reasons) they also have taken my on family vacations, I guess they are trying to keep in the family but when I'm there they don't talk much even when I try to start up conversations, but they are trying. My Step Father is very distant and I think it might be his views on gays being lesser then straight people, I learned this in my teen years. | | | |
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08-15-2006
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#5 (permalink)
| | Guest | I have a great relationship with my parents. I actually have to, for I'm in a transitional phase in my life (between HS & college) and since I haven't been able to put my finger on exactly what I want to do (decision making is my downfall  ), I still happen to be living with them. It's an open, loving, respectful bond between us ... and I know that no matter what I do, they will still love me ... and they know that I will always love them  ... and to answer an earlier question jeff ... No, they don't know about the fridge picture  | | | |
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08-16-2006
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#6 (permalink)
| | | My parents are great frozen Scandanavians, and in so far as they have external indicators of emotion, things seem to be going much better now than they did after I came out to them. Still, they gently express the wish that I was "normal" and can't quite unlearn their small town homophobia in the literal, fearful sense. | | | |
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08-16-2006
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#7 (permalink)
| | | Not an easy question to answer, jeff. My mom was one of my best friends. Of course, there were some subjects that we just didn't discuss, but I was out with her and she was fine with that. Unfortunately, she died a little over 4 years ago. I'm cool with it, though, she lived a long life, and died a sudden, unexpected death (so there was no long, lingering suffering.) Funny thing, even though she was more "strict" than parents of my friends or my siblings' friends, they all preferred hanging around at my house...
My dad and I always got along, but after my parents divorced and dad remarried, no matter how hard I tried to get along with her (just so I could spend time with dad) she was and still is the most hateful, selfish bitch I have ever met. I couldn't stand being around her, so I haven't been around dad much over the last few decades. Funny thing, I talked to him about it, told him that even though I really tried, I just could not stand to be around her, and I would come to visit if he would send her away for the day. Never happened. | | | |
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08-16-2006
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#8 (permalink)
| | | I've never had a father and I find it hard to like my mother, I try not to talk to her much. | | | |
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08-16-2006
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#9 (permalink)
| | | Relationship with dad was always great, never got on with my mother, she was very too judgemental and always wanted me to be just like her, a proper little housewife in pastels who lived to serve her man.
Since I came out to them, which was only in May this year, me and my father are the same and now my mother is just as bad but tried to word things differently in the hope that I dont catch on to what she's trying to say | | | |
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08-16-2006
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#10 (permalink)
| | | My dad died when I was 11. I am the oldest of four kids so I was close to my mother in raising my younger sibs.
Now, Mom's 80 and, like me, crippled with arthritis and cardio concerns. Years ago I moved her in to the lower level of my tri-level house so I could be her caregiver.
We have always gotten along very well. | | | |
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08-16-2006
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#11 (permalink)
| | | My deceased father was loving, yet undemonstrative, and supportive of everything I did; I miss him terribly. My mother continues to give me unconditional love. They raised us to let us make our own mistakes and learn how to accept that bad behavior had bad consequences but rarely laid a hand on us. The better part of me I owe to my parents; I accept personal responsibilty for my shortcomings. | | | |
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08-16-2006
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#12 (permalink)
| | Banned | I'm extrememly fortunate jeff.
My relationship with my mother is one of the best friendships I enjoy.
My dad's a bit more distant but he's the genuine article.
Neither had or has an issue with my homosexuality. Both parents have known many (and my father dabbled a bit with men earlier) in their sexual careers. Quote: |
Originally Posted by COLJohn The better part of me I owe to my parents; I accept personal responsibilty for my shortcomings. | I love this response John. It mirrors my own. I accept (and work on daily) my own personal shortcomings. It's a full time job...  | | | |
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08-16-2006
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#13 (permalink)
| | | Bad. Very bad. I've posted about it before. | | | |
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08-16-2006
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#14 (permalink)
| | | I get on great with both parents. We live about 2000 miles apart but see each other 2-3 times a year. We speak on the phone or via webcam a couple of times a week.
Living so far apart when we do get together it is usually for a couple of weeks unlike the odd weekend when I lived in the UK. This can lead to quite heated arguements but we accept those as normal (we are all very headstrong) and they are usually very short-lived.
We had a few problems when I came out more than 20 years ago but we worked it out after a few months. They treat my partner just like they treat me - sometimes better.
I think the secret is honesty and acceptance. No-one teaches you how to be a parent or how to be a son/daughter! | | | |
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08-16-2006
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#15 (permalink)
| | | My parents were really cool cats actually. I came out in high school and things did get a little rocky. Mom was accepting and would get all too excited when Oprah would have a gay themed show. "Are you coming home right after school today? Because Oprah is having gay people on her show this afternoon and I was hoping you'd watch it with me!" Looking back on that is amusing, and I always came right home on those days to watch Oprah with mom. Dad was ex-military and was NOT happy at all. I'm glad I came out when I did, though. Mom died when I was 18 and Dad died when I was 19. They both accepted me before passing and I am so very thankful for it.
My coming out experience, my childhood, my parents...all exceptional. I wouldn't change a thing as I was very fortunate. | | | |
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