Welcome Cal,

You are in exactly the right place. I was pretty well exactly in the same situation as you, with the same principles as you, and there were times when my own anxieties reinforced by other people's comments were hard to deal with.

There are lots of threads here about how a very well hung guy can help his partner adjust to his girth, and stop himself going in too deep too soon ... but in the end the reassurance you (and he) need only comes from a loving partner. If your relationship is solid, then your size isn't going to turn her off. I would say that at some point however she needs to be gently put in the picture as to the scale of the challenge (to reduce the shock element).

You have all the time in the world to deal with (and enjoy ;) ) the process of adjustment.