You've reminded me of a restaurant breakfast I had in Tappahannock, Virginia when I was in the Archaeology Club in college (doing a dig on a 1730's Lee family home in the Northern Neck).

The prices were rather steep for a poor student. I should have been prepared for that when I noticed that there were real tablecloths and real cloth napkins on the tables. The plates were very large, making the 2-egg, 2-slices of bacon servings look very small.

I looked forlornly at the $6.95 breakfast before me and called the waitress back. I said,

"Would you kindly bring me another plate, please? This one still seems to have the last diner's leftovers on it."

Pecker

(What has balls and screws old ladies? A bingo machine.)