| Pillsbury Doughboy (1934 - 2005)
It is with the saddest heart that I must pass on the following news.
Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment
community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection
and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.
Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities
turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry
Jack, the California raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and
Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours. Aunt Jemima
delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who
never
knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose ! quickly in show
business,
but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a
very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes.
Despite being a little flaky at times he was still a crusty old man
and
was considered a roll model for millions. Doughboy is survived by his
wife Play Dough, two children, John Dough and Jane Dough, plus they
had
one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly dad, Pop Tart. The
funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes. | 
