I call my dick Clark, because it's still going strong
And I call your dick Cheney, 'cause it's already gone

My dick is their Everest, it's a challenge to throat it
Your dick can only say the same because nobody wants to hold it

My dick's a work of art just like the Taj Mahal
Your dick is ballpoint graffiti in a bathroom stall

My dick is so large, they say I'm packin' like a suitcase
Your dick smells strangely like your little sister's face

My dick is the king, so bless the monarch's head
Your dick is like The King, bitch 30 years dead