With all due respect Phil, then no, you're really not against any of that. This was the attitude of my parents as well. They'd say, "There's nothing wrong with nudity, it's natural, blah blah blah," because that's what Dr. Spock told them to say. The reality was very different and sent some very confusing signals. I see the same thing here. You claim one thing but then spend 80% of the post denying what you just claimed!

Something I think some child psychologists get right: If you really and truly believe that nudity equates to a sexual situation then don't say one thing but do another. Just say outright that you think nudity is inappropriate. On the other hand, if you truly do not believe that nudity equates to sex, then raise your kids that way. Waffling, it seems, does more damage than admitting to yourself that you do have bias.


I don't see an issue with a daughter bathing with her father no matter the height or whatever. I do have an issue with her giving him a blow job, which seems to be what sparks the fear underlying the situation. The two are not related. Sure she might comment on his penis. I'd think it strange if she didn't because kids are curious. Simple explanations with age-appropriate information is all that's needed. Once her curiosity is satisfied then you move on. The key is that the father can't be uncomfortable about it. If he is, then his daughter will detect that discomfort and realize there's something not right and that is where problems occur.

Right now, I can honestly say I don't think I could bathe with my daughter though I wish I could be that open and relaxed about it because I think it would be best for her sense of well-being. I could bathe with my son, no problem, because I'm comfortable enough with shared male nudity in such situations that it truly doesn't bother me and, therefore, I won't subconsciously transmit mixed messages about nudity in male company being inappropriate.