Get yourself a stainless steel hose and dildo to hook to your shower head. Lay down in the tub on your back and clean yourself out really good. Don't rush because it will take about 45 min to do it well. Use warm water too. Then take a rather long dildo and start to fuck yourself until you have it all the way up. The more you do this, the more relaxed you become. Then you will be ready to take one up the butt the size of Quercusone.