thinking is good, but trying terribly to understand THE OTHER SIDE in your question, you place YOURSELF and them in neat little boxes that have little to do with life and its possibilities. it's better if you try to understand yourself, and be true to yourself. it might be healthy to pursue your own interests, based on who you think are, what you aspire to be, what you learn, how you interact with people, and what life brings!

someone trying to control or "value" the sex life of others is very possibly either miserable, a closet sex-maniac, or power-hungry who wishes to gain something by this control.

an outsider judging others based on assumptions of their "life styles" won't have a clue.

one has to decide whom to listen to for support and advice. for instance, i won't pain my days listening to my stupidest, meanest relatives, or the religious right's latest witch hunts, or the neo-nazies claims for Hitler's sainthood... one can choose which other side to try to understand:)